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[17 Oct 2008|09:20pm] |
A masquerade? How precious.
Pity I'm bed-bound with chronic fatigue.
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[26 Sep 2008|01:27pm] |
I don't think I can even expound on what a horrid summer this has been, but since I love to complain, I shall.
My sister Belinda, who some of you may know by the fetching terms of "slag," "whore," "slapper," "slutbag," and "sluttypants" (my personal favourite that I in no way helped propagate mind you) has seen fit to make my entire summer a living nightmare. And once again she's succeeded. It's funny how annoyance seems to be the only talent she's ever had an affinity for. Unless, that is, you count shagging the hell out of every semi-attractive bloke she comes across, but I don't.
So, what have we learned from this, children? You cannot sleep your way to the top - unless you count packing bags at the grocer's to be "the top," but I think most people with comprehension skills higher than that of a toddler's do not.
I think I ought to end this now, seeing as Belinda is reading over my shoulder and chewing loudly in my ear, which she knows I hate, once again proving that she does in fact succeed at annoyance.
Breaking news (and I write that with loaded sarcasm): Whoreface Sluttypants Lady of the night Belinda wants all of you to know that blue is the new pink and to stay far away from orange this season. She'd also like to share her personal mantra with everyone: Being fabulous is the first step in making the world a more attractive place.
Words of wisdom, no doubt.
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